


I'm here for you.

by yoimwriting



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alec has the most beautiful pet names for Magnus, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Future, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Kinda?, Light Angst, M/M, POV Alec Lightwood, Pet Names, Shadowhunters (TV) Trailer(s) - Malec Promos, Supportive Alec Lightwood, and that's canon on my mind, human Magnus bane, ish, you know which one
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-26
Updated: 2018-12-26
Packaged: 2019-09-27 22:21:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17170502
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yoimwriting/pseuds/yoimwriting
Summary: “But you are still you, at least to me. You are still Magnus Bane. The man who would help anymore who needed his help, the man who sheltered million of downworlders, not caring about their race because he just wanted to help. The man who give food to wild cats even thought he’s allergic. The man who helped me find my true self and be happy. The man I love. And I don’t care if I have to say it every day just so you don’t forget it.”Magnus visibly swallowed and nodded. “I just… I miss it. I miss my magic and maybe it’s naïve of me to miss the demon side of me, but I do, and I don’t know if I made the right decision of giving it away. I don’t know if I can get it back.”“We’ll figure it out, okay? We will” Alec reassured him, holding his hand tight.“What if I really lost it for good, Alexander? What if I feel like this for the rest of my life? Empty.”***The aftermath of Magnus losing his magic.





	I'm here for you.

**Author's Note:**

> Let's keep the angst spree, shall we?  
> This is after the last Malec sneak peak. I woke up and I had to write this because it wouldn't let me live.
> 
> Not beta read because my beta is taking a well deserved break ;) all mistakes are mine
> 
> E N J O Y!

As much as Alec liked being back to work, getting knees-deep on the whole Clary-missing situation and a greater demon on the loose, there was only one person on his mind.

Magnus.

It wasn’t like he didn’t trust Magnus to take care of himself for a few hours while Alec was back at the Institute, but he was worried. He knew Magnus by now and at some point, he would have a mental breakdown because the man was known to bottled everything up, keep a smile on his face until it was too much.

Alec was determined not to let that happen again.

So, he made his way back to the loft, maybe expecting Magnus be laying down, getting reacquainted to the mundane ways, maybe even sleeping.

But not _this._

The loft was a complete mess. There was a weird smell coming from the kitchen that Alec wasn’t in a rush to find out what happened there, there was clothes littered all over the floor as if Magnus tossed them carelessly. There was a cabinet where Magnus used to stash his liquor that was open, and the bottles were a broken glass of pile on the floor. The living room, if Alec could call it that, was another story.

The coffee table wasn’t there anymore and from his standing point, Alec could see that the balcony was open. Something told him that the coffee table could be there, the question was _why_. The sofas were rearranged, all of them facing the window, except for the big one where he could see that Magnus was laying down.

Leaving everything on the floor, not caring at this point, he walked to the sofa.

“Magnus?” he asked softly, “Babe, what happened?”

He moved one of the loveseats closer to the sofa.

Magnus had his eyes closed and shook his head. His appearance was another different thing; his clothes looked rumpled, his make-up was smeared all over his face and his hair looked greasy.

“Come on, talk to me” Alec insisted, trying to keep his cool, not making any sudden move, but deep down he was dying to scoop Magnus up and hold him until all of this was over.

“I’m a fraud” Magnus said, his voice hoarse.

“Why? Why do you say that?”

“Because I can’t do a simple thing as cutting vegetables!” he shouted, opening his eyes while raising one of his hands. There were several band-aids on his palm and fingers. “Because I can’t do the cleaning as I want to, I don’t remember how to do my make-up, I’m useless!”

Alec swallowed the rage that was threatening to down him at the sight of his boyfriend crying silently, hiding his mouth behind his hand. He never asked this, Magnus shouldn’t had given something so important like his magic. Jace didn’t deserve the sacrifice and if Alec wouldn’t have been an idiot, he would have told Magnus that they would have found another way.

“I thought I would feel like a weight has lifted off my shoulders but it’s nothing like that” Magnus looked at him, his tears running down his cheeks. He shook his head. “I thought that I would feel more _human_ , that I would learn how to survive, to adapt but I’m– I don’t feel like myself anymore, Alexander. I lost my position, I lost my magic. I don’t even know who I am anymore.”

Alec leaned forward. “Pretty, listen to me– Can I touch you?” Magnus nodded, and Alec didn’t waste time on taking his hand and placing it between his own. “Listen to me. I know this is hard. I won’t pretend to know what it feels like to have magic and losing it, but I know what it is to not feel like your own self. It’s horrible and you don’t really see the point in everything that you do.”

Magnus stared at him, expectantly, his eyes wide open while the tears kept on running down.

“But you are still you, at least to me. You are still Magnus Bane. The man who would help anymore who needed his help, the man who sheltered million of downworlders, not caring about their race because he just wanted to help. The man who give food to wild cats even thought he’s allergic. The man who helped me find my true self and be happy. The man I love. And I don’t care if I have to say it every day just so you don’t forget it.”

Magnus visibly swallowed and nodded. “I just… I miss it. I miss my magic and maybe it’s naïve of me to miss the demon side of me, but I do, and I don’t know if I made the right decision of giving it away. I don’t know if I can get it back.”

“We’ll figure it out, okay? We will” Alec reassured him, holding his hand tight.

“What if I really lost it for good, Alexander? What if I feel like this for the rest of my life? Empty.”

Magnus was getting frantic again, shaking his head, more tears running down.

“Magnus, look at me. Look at me–” Wide eyes were on him again accompanied with heavy breathing.” –You won’t feel like this for the rest of your life, okay? You won’t. You have people that support you, that will help you get through this. You have me and I’m not leaving you, not by a long shot.”

“But what use am I if I can’t help? Lilith is on the loose and Clary–”

“No” Alec cut him off, sharply. “No one is more important than you right now. You’re my priority and everything else can wait. I’ll take whatever time off I need just to be here for you.”

Magnus shook his head again. “You don’t have to. There are more important things–”

“Pretty, no. I won’t change my mind. I’m here for you. We’ll get through this and get your magic back, whatever it takes.”

“And what if I never get it back? Then what?”

“I’ll teach you how to be a mundane, then. It’s never too late to learn. Hell, we can watch tutorials on Youtube. How to cook, we can clean the loft together, I’ll teach you how to catch the metro. How to do your make-up; we can even go to the mall and get all your favorites.”

“Like a date?”

This time, Alec smiled. “Like a date.”

After a moment, Magnus said, “I’m terrible at the kitchen.”

“Then we can live off Chinese take out and pizza. I don’t mind” Alec offered, getting a laugh out his boyfriend. The best sound of this earth if Alec was being honest. “I’m here for you, Magnus, and we can solve this together, okay?”

Magnus nodded, that little smile of his on his lips. “Okay.”

“Come here.” Alec opened his arms, letting Magnus fall into his lap, letting him circle his arms around his own neck, holding him tight because Alec was doing the same. “I love you.”

Against the side of his neck, Magnus replied an “I love you too” hugging him tighter.

They would get through this. They would get Magnus’ magic back, whatever it took.

_And that’s a promise._

**Author's Note:**

> I love a supportive boyfriend. Also, "pretty" is a fav pet name of mine and it's fitting for Alec to call Magnus like that. It's canon now and that's that on that.


End file.
